You might come across an article or two where you can find some good information on parenting, but you wonʻt find that here. I wonʻt give you tips on how to parent. After 21 years, I still donʻt know what the hell Iʻm doing. If you think I have any answers on how to raise children, you definitely came to the wrong place. What I can do though, is give you tips on how to survive parenting. I will dazzle you with strategies on how to survive, and I guarantee, you wonʻt find anything you find here, anywhere else. No one else would dare to say the things I say. Most people would hide under a rock before telling you the dumb things theyʻve done. But, me. I have no problem telling you the dumb things Iʻve done. I have learned, that the more dumb things I admit to, the more friends I get. I really do believe that all of us do more dumb things than weʻd like to admit. Thatʻs why itʻs my mission to make it acceptable to let loose about the dumb things weʻve done. Iʻm not talking about the silly things. Iʻm not talking about the things we do to get a laugh–not that kind of dumb. Itʻs the kind of dumb that we donʻt know is dumb until after weʻve done it. Iʻm an expert at those kinds of dumb things.
Let me give you an idea on how dumb Iʻve been. Hereʻs dumb thing number one: I actually thought that I could bully my kids into listening to me. Hereʻs dumb thing number two: I actually made contracts with my kids in an effort to modify their behavior. Hereʻs dumb thing number three: I actually thought that if I didnʻt do certain things, they wouldnʻt either. Those are some damn dumb things. Kids who get bullied by their parents just get smarter in how they bullshit you. Kids donʻt care about contracts. They eventually get whatever they want anyway. Theyʻre good like that. Kids donʻt care what you have or have not done. If they want to do it, or not do it, what you have or havenʻt done, means not one damn thing. Most kids are selfish and self-centered. Itʻs just the way things are.
So, hereʻs the first tip to help you stay sane!
Tip #1:Never expect them to listen.
If you think youʻll ever understand who they are, forget about it. Just do your best to impart the knowledge youʻve gained from the many more years youʻve been on earth. Share that knowledge whenever the time arises. Donʻt expect them to show you they care or that they are listening. Talk until you are blue in the face, but donʻt expect anybody to actually be listening to you. If you talk your head off, but not worry one bit about anyone ever listening, youʻll be good. Have no expectations and you canʻt be disappointed. Stay tuned for the next tip. Coming soon. After the 3rd tip, youʻll be pleasantly surprised. Theyʻll maybe be light at the end of the dark, dingy tunnel.
I hope you read the first part of my article. Tip #1 was a great one. Never expect them to listen. In case you missed it, check it out in my blog.